Tonight on the subway after my good friend Catherine got off at her stop I put my headphones on.
I listened to some Rachel Yamagata because yes, the movie Leap Year made me feel sappy and I felt like continuing the sap because at my core I’m a super lame-ass.
The above sentence is irrelevant.
About one stop after we said our goodbyes, the man lurking in the corner, staring at me was suddenly sitting right next to me, breathing boozy breath directly in my face.
Slowly he took out his headphones. I assumed I had to follow suit, so I did.
Then he asked me “How you doin’?”
I replied. “Um, I’m ok, but I kinda’ feel like sitting by myself. So I’m going to go over there. (pointing)”
“Oh, really?”
“Um, yeah. Bye.”
Is it just me folks, or are you also tired of dealing with these “pick-ups”. I don’t care if it’s online or in person but ‘How you’ doin’?” … Really? Reeeeaaaaally???
… try fucking harder.
Actually, stop trying. Trying harder won’t get you anywhere so there is really no point.
I know where it’s going when you’re sitting there staring. I know that look in your eyes when you’re looking at me like I’m sex on legs and thinking you’re going to score. It’s not a compliment. Really it’s not. It’s a creepiment. Yes, creepiment. I’m sticking with that. Now fuck off.
And no, it’s not that the guy was bad looking. He actually was alright. Not my type, but certainly not “ugly”. But it goes to show. If anyone does something like that, they’re instantly ugly to me.
Sheesh.
Filed under: Disaster
A ‘creepiment’??? I LOVE it. You need to turn that one in to Urban Dictionary!
2 quick things:
#1) Maybe I’m a misanthrope, but I don’t remove my headphones even when it’s obvious somebody wants to talk to me, unless I want to talk to them. You say above you felt you “had to” follow suit. Don’t be afraid to ignore people is my advice. But maybe that’s just me.
#2) Can I suggest the word be creepliment? Without the L in there it doesn’t sound right to my ears.
Hmmm…depends. If he looks good and isn’t creepy, I’d like for him to approach and say something. However, this is not usually the case.
Normally it’s the guy missing front teeth, or smells like he slept in the bus station, or paces back and forth mumbling to himself. In that case, no thanks.
I feel your pain on the booze breath in your face (sexy…not!) and the lame ass line ‘how you doin’?’
@ Heinlien Fan – adding the L to creepiment to make it creepliment is sheer genius!
To quote Jerry Seinfeld, “This is really the best that us guys have come up with.”