Secrets From Samantha’s Purse

I can never decide if I love or hate Valentine’s Day. I’m a romantic, right? So I should automatically love a day that focuses on love. But then again, I’m also a non-traditionalist, non-monogamous, celebrate love ALL the time, question-everything member of society, and that viewpoint doesn’t line up with this single day of roses, chocolate, monogamy, and “the one”. Which is basically all that Cupid cares about, you guys.

That, and scoring you the most “romantic” dinner reservation using OpenTable – which is likely next to the kitchen, on a table that needs napkins under its legs.

Anyway, my point? Well, I’m getting to it. I want to tell you about some fun little products to make your Valentine’s Date Night awesome, since I am lucky enough to personally sample many of the goods at Ohhh Canada (life is really hard, you guys). I thought I’d tell you about a few items that I like to always have on hand, whether it’s a special Cupid friendly night, or just a regular ol’ Tuesday with a side of dirty spice. Individually, they might not all seem to suggest a saucy time’s about to happen, but trust me when I tell you there’s a method to my sluttyness.

And here’s a tip, boys and girls. If you and I are out together, my purse falls open, and these things roll onto the floor? Well, you can be certain that I might have my eyes on the contents of your pants. By might, I mean that I do. (Note: the contents of my purse at the end of the night might contain my underwear and some latex gloves I’ve scored from the sex club we just went to, but this post is about making our way to that stage.) 😉

Kama Sutra Honey Dust

I’m not one for lots of traditional “girly” things, and it’s not something I need my girl dates to do for themselves, but personally? I love dusting myself with a generous serving of honey dust in all the right places.

“Mmm, you taste like honey” would normally be a compliment that might have me running for the hills, away from the cheesy PUA trying to get in my head, but in this case, I love it. I’ve been using this stuff probably since I was 18, and will continue to be a faithful honey duster until I die. The raspberry is my current choice … it smells like an adult, sexy version of Mr. Bubble (yes, that’s a thing), and the honeysuckle is a close second. We have a Chocolate Caress demo in the store and, while I still like it, find myself smelling it occasionally because it reminds me of hot chocolate.

Grab yourself some honey dust for just $19.99. Trust me, it will last you a LONG time and you’ve never been so lickably delicious.

Sweet Spot On-The-Go Wipettes

Ok, maybe there’s a bit of a theme here. I know that lots of ladies love to go au naturel with their bits, and that’s amazing and wonderful, but I’m such a clean freak that having these wipes on me before a sex date is the best thing after being able to have a shower. Stuck at work all day and feeling a little blah before your date? A little basil grapefruit or geranium lavender will perk you right up. PLUS they’re pH-balanced just for us gals, and come in so many great scents. Yum, clean!

Grab yourself a bunch and store ’em in your pass next to your condom stash. They’re only 0.85 each!

Hemp Lip Balm by Earthly Body

I did something dumb last night and went out on a make-out date without this lip balm in my purse. What a silly woman I am, though he made sure my lips stayed nice and wet all evening! While this lip balm is definitely difficult to get started – I recommend making a bit of a dent in it with something like a bobby pin to start with, to make it easy to cover the curve of your finger – it definitely lasts a long time on your lips. It comes in a bunch of delightful flavours that sound made up, but for such a low price, you might as well try one of each, right?

Get yourself coated and ready for smooching for just $2.99!

Skin Body Butter by Earthly Body

This one makes me crazy happy. I’m the girl who collects lotions and butters and always has at least 6 different containers on the go at any time. I happened to run out of just about all of them when I got my hands on the Naked in the Woods scent of this delightful body butter, and wow, what perfect timing. It smells like a spa, with rose, almond, and cucumber oils in it (plus other lovely things), but it really spoke to me because it smells just like a fancy candle I had in my room when I was 18 that made me feel like a grown-ass adult. Plus, it’s great for massages, absorbs easily, and leaves your skin with a fresh smell that lasts a long time. Mmmm.

Run naked in the woods yourself for $14.99!

So, there you have it. While it might not appear at first glance like the obvious sexy stuff you’d expect to find in my bag, TRUST me when I say that these are my guaranteed date night fun items for those of you who want to feel like a lady.

If you want to grab these, and other fun products for yourself, visit Ohhh Canada on the web, or if you’re in Toronto visit us (and once a week, me!) in person at our second floor store at 721 Queen Street West, at Queen and Tecumseh. Plus, there’s still time for some of you to score this stuff at your door before Cupid’s arrow strikes! Check out our shipping deadlines.

Stay tuned because soon I have to review the Lelo Smart Touch Wand, an adorable paddle that leaves star impressions and feels oh-so-wonderfully-perfect, and some organic lube. I better get myself to bed and do a few more … tests.

Happy Valentine’s EVERY Day, kids!