Fear of Being a Stepping Stone

I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. I’m waiting for him to decide that he doesn’t want to be the boyfriend of a married woman, even if I strive to give him so much of me and of life. I’m wondering when he’ll realize personal demands that I simply cannot meet. I’m wondering when . . . → Read More: Fear of Being a Stepping Stone

Nothing Is Something

I get it. You might think that it’s nothing to disappear. I can see why you might think it was a mistake getting back in touch; it doesn’t matter if it was intentionally with conversation or through that classically complicated mutual right swipe. Either way, you stayed around for a while and didn’t say much, . . . → Read More: Nothing Is Something

Let’s Be Friends

Trigger warning: body shaming

Last night I hung out with a friend who, for a while last year, was someone I was dating / sleeping with / whatever you want to call it. We met early in January 2014 and I instantly liked him. Handsome, charming, perfectly antagonistic in the way that I seem to . . . → Read More: Let’s Be Friends

(No More) Daddy Issues

Fun fact: I am turning 35 in a month and I have a 27 year old Daddy.

It’s taken me a long time to get to this point. My kink path has taken me down some interesting exploratory routes as I’ve tried to find the right role for me. I’ve tried being a slave (that . . . → Read More: (No More) Daddy Issues

Finding My New Place In The Crowd

It doesn’t feel like that long ago that Steph and I were considered the strange misfits among everyone we knew for being non-monogamous, but on the other hand, yeah ok, it sort of does. If 2014 still has us living in a society where we have so many backwards thinkers wandering around wreaking havoc, then 2006, when we . . . → Read More: Finding My New Place In The Crowd

Always The Bride

So, I think there’s something wrong with me.

I’m not sure I know what it is though. I know I’ve gained weight lately; working at home and not having access to all my gym equipment temporarily has taken its toll on me. I have a little more cushion than I did before, so obviously I’m . . . → Read More: Always The Bride

Help, I Need Somebody!

Humans aren’t often very good at getting their needs met. It’s easier to let ego take over, to pretend that everything’s fine and that you’re impervious to the world around you getting you down. To admit that you need, to admit that you feel, to admit that you struggle; isn’t it just easier to say . . . → Read More: Help, I Need Somebody!

Welcome to the Frustration Station

I haven’t visited NYMP or written anything in almost two months. It’s not that there hasn’t been anything to say; in fact there have been countless blog posts at the ready, but I just haven’t been able to share them. It’s embarrassing to see the site where it is, with that last post about Alex . . . → Read More: Welcome to the Frustration Station

Passing the Kinky Baton: Meet Alex

Ok. So maybe I was a little bit dramatic before. When I wrote about things ending with James/Daddy, I was sad. I was across the ocean, stuck in gloomy weather, and starting to notice that our flirty messages that I was so excited for weren’t so flirty anymore. For such an intense start, things fizzled . . . → Read More: Passing the Kinky Baton: Meet Alex

Confession: I’m a Secret Lover

You know that feeling you get when you haven’t had something that you want, something that you need, in a really, really long time, and suddenly it’s in front of you, so close that you can taste it and smell it. So close that every fibre of your being is consumed with that overwhelming need . . . → Read More: Confession: I’m a Secret Lover