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On Being Amazing

At my dad’s funeral in 2004, one detail has always stuck out for me; how many people came up to me afterward to tell me what a nice service it was. In the absence of familiarity, strangers found themselves obligated to fill the silence with generic words of solace. Better than saying nothing, some would . . . → Read More: On Being Amazing

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2013: Life By Design

I was a bit of an idiot in 2012. I pulled that typical end of year shit where I told myself “Don’t worry, Self, 2012 will be awesome and everything will be shiny and new. Everything that was bad will magically become great and you won’t have to do any work because that’s just how . . . → Read More: 2013: Life By Design

I Can See Clearly Now

I knew that I was going to really need our recent Mexico vacation. I had been working around the clock every day, every weekend, almost every minute, for months and I was existing in a temporary depression. What I didn’t realize however, was just exactly how transformative the time away would be for me.

It’s . . . → Read More: I Can See Clearly Now

It’s Not You, It’s Totally Me

(Printed with permission from the subject.)

This is a real thing. As much as it’s a perfect cliché soap opera line, it really is a thing, and it sucks.

It’s been 5 and something months now and James and I still haven’t had sex. I know my last post about him suggested that after a . . . → Read More: It’s Not You, It’s Totally Me

The Massive James Update or “Cockward” for Short

When I tell most people about my relationship with James, they’re confused. How is it possible that I’ve been dating someone for almost four months and I’ve only seen him naked – or almost naked – once? (twice now, since last night!)

It’s not my normal M.O. to wait this long. Not that I jump . . . → Read More: The Massive James Update or “Cockward” for Short

Confession: I did not consent

Please note: This post may be triggering for some as it deals with sexual assault.

I’ve had a post floating around in my head lately that revolves around a situation I had put out of my mind; a time when a partner pushed past my limits and took advantage of my submission and because I . . . → Read More: Confession: I did not consent

It’s Not You, It’s Me

If it’s possible that a year can have a theme, this was it for 2011. Last year was all about me giving absolutely every last drop of energy I could to other people, putting myself last. But it didn’t matter. In the end, there was nothing I could do to change the situations that surrounded . . . → Read More: It’s Not You, It’s Me

Y. Oh Y.

Unlike riding a bike, dating for me, is quite … unlike riding a bike. It’s not something I can just pick up again because there are so many factors like state of being, state of relationships and state of confidence that come into play each time.

However, I’ve come to the conclusion that maybe I . . . → Read More: Y. Oh Y.

Knowing is literally only 1/2 the battle

(Thanks GI Joe!)

Seeing is believing, right? If only that could be the case all the time. I used to have a huge problem with knowing something about myself and still believing the exact opposite. This often affected my self-image. In fact, it was mainly ONLY related to my self-image. No matter what I knew, . . . → Read More: Knowing is literally only 1/2 the battle

Fit to be tied

Today I had an impromptu date with Harvey who happened to be available. I needed to escape into submission and he was available.

It was a quick hour and a half but it was totally what I needed to calm my brain down, if only for the time he was here. We haven’t been together . . . → Read More: Fit to be tied