Monogamy Isn’t Broken, But We Are

Sometimes I imagine what non-monogamy looks like to an outsider, though I can’t really remember what I used to think when I was one myself. I suspect that polyamory, or whatever form of non-monogamy someone is living, looks chaotic to the outside eye. When held up against the pristine perfection that is supposed to be . . . → Read More: Monogamy Isn’t Broken, But We Are

Feelings and Fence Posts

The other night while Steph was having a bath, I went in to hang out with him. I ended up confessing, while squished on the floor between the toilet and the wall, that I was feeling – to steal Jessica’s word – “ways” about his relationship with the new woman he is seeing.

I wasn’t . . . → Read More: Feelings and Fence Posts

Shame! I want it gone forever!

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about two things, shame and confidence. How they affect us, shape who we are, and direct our actions. How some people are crippled by shame or a lack of confidence, while others soar either because of or in spite of them.

I’ve always had a lot of . . . → Read More: Shame! I want it gone forever!

It’s Not You, It’s Totally Me

(Printed with permission from the subject.)

This is a real thing. As much as it’s a perfect cliché soap opera line, it really is a thing, and it sucks.

It’s been 5 and something months now and Brad and I still haven’t had sex. I know my last post about him suggested that after a . . . → Read More: It’s Not You, It’s Totally Me

Boundaries. Expectations. Assumptions.

The word boundaries has come up so much in my recent conversations that I’ve started to almost say it daily. On top of noticing that it’s been making such a regular appearance with both friends AND lovers, I’ve realized that it’s not something that we – and by we, I mean mainstream society – encourage . . . → Read More: Boundaries. Expectations. Assumptions.

Confessions of a Fat Kid: How “I’m lazy” destroys self-worth

I’ve been holding off on writing anything lately because I’ve had a bit of a chip on my blog’s shoulder that I’ve needed to remove. I told myself that I can’t write about anything sexy or otherwise until I am finally honest with myself about something that is really eating at my core. I’m afraid . . . → Read More: Confessions of a Fat Kid: How “I’m lazy” destroys self-worth

I Ain’t No Poster Child

When I first started this blog I never wanted to be a poster child for non-monogamy. Sure, I’ve enjoyed what limited “fame” I’ve achieved (if you can call it that), but I don’t aspire to be the go to person when the media needs someone to talk to. That being said, I’m always happy to . . . → Read More: I Ain’t No Poster Child

On Rob Ford and Fat Shaming. An Easy Joke or a Symptom of Something More?

A simple Facebook status conversation has inspired me to write this post because my brain is now buzzing with thoughts on how the media talks about fat people.

It was innocent enough. An article in the Toronto Star – known obviously as being the mortal media enemy of Toronto mayor Rob Ford – talking about . . . → Read More: On Rob Ford and Fat Shaming. An Easy Joke or a Symptom of Something More?

Online Dating: My Policies

If I “meet” you on an online dating site – probably okCupid since it’s the only one I’m on – there’s a few things you should know about how we will interact with one another. Online dating can be an absolute minefield. My girlfriends and I have long email threads dedicated to the disgusting, crass . . . → Read More: Online Dating: My Policies

Do YOU want to move the couch?

Steph just looked at me and asked “Do you think we should move the couch over? It’s covering up the vent.”

I replied: “Nah, I think it’s ok?”

He replied, in a snarky, condescending voice: “Well that’s the only vent on this floor so keeping it covered doesn’t make any sense. Right?”

To which I . . . → Read More: Do YOU want to move the couch?