Steph and I got there first and made our way around the corner to Bathurst and Bloor. In hindsight it probably wasn’t the best place to stand as we were close to the subway exit, causing the pathway to be basically non-existent behind us. There was no way that friends would be able to get us, never mind find a place to stand. But as we had some time to kill before they arrived, we waited and tried to enjoy what we could see of the crazy spectacle, otherwise known as the parade.

And the holiday spirit came out in full force, not disappointing within minutes.

Nothing says Christmas like Crotch Clowns

In front of us for a few rows were families of all colors. Cameras in hand, children waving at whatever weird creature was coming down the street at them next. Behind us? Pure hell. People pushing and yelling, blaming one another for the line not moving. One girl couldn’t breathe, was having a panic attack and burst into tears. “Why aren’t they moooooving?” she was howling. (Of course, people stopped walking on the pathway and thought it to be a good place to stand.” Another woman two people behind her flipping out that no one is making the line move, almost ready to punch and kick I’m sure. Everyone around her telling her to calm down.

A dude turns around to a strange woman saying “Listen if you push me ONE more time … ” to which she replies “Oh, I’m gonna’.”

And my favorite, the seemingly drunk at noon (or very hungover) hipster who was going on about how Santa wasn’t real, how it was the worst day of his life, how he just needed to cross the street to pay the bartender and meet his friends and how he didn’t even have any kids.

… “but I might.”

Happy Holidays indeed.