Hi friends, I’m Samantha Fraser (she/her), author of the book Not Your Mother’s Playground: A realistic guide to honest, happy, and healthy open relationships, published in 2013, and I’m so glad you’re here.
I’m a pansexual/queer, chronically ill/disabled, submissive & kinky, Toronto based Realtor and community builder with a passion for helping people achieve their dreams and live their truths. I have over 20 tattoos, wear a lot of leopard print, and am a chronic over-sharer. I’ve learned over the years that sharing my stories, good and bad, often resonates with people, and helping people feel less alone on their own journeys is what I truly believe is my life’s purpose. My life is better when shared with other people. Also, I like the attention, let’s be realistic.
My husband Steph (he/him) and I opened our marriage in August of 2006, at a time when barely anyone else was doing so. Through trial, error, some hurt feelings, a lost job, some lost friends, and some amazing memories, we figured things out and were lucky to witness other people starting to also embrace ethical non-monogamy or ENM along the way.
In January 2015, I met my now second husband (not legally, just spiritually?) Jory (he/him), and the three of us and our now six cats, all moved in together in August of 2017 in Toronto’s west end. In 2015 I also started to get chronically ill and not long after the three of us became, well, monogamish for that and other reasons. In September of 2021 I realized that I wanted to return to my life from before, but with a better and healthier mindset. My inner kinky slut has been revived and I am excited to see what life brings to me. This is why I’ve brought this site, NYMP, back.
The blog grew a following from 2008 to 2016 and touched a lot of lives. When the three of us stopped dating other people, coinciding with my illnesses ramping up, I stopped writing. Eventually I forgot to renew it and all of the content was lost, but I’m excited to be returning now in 2021 to get a fresh start.
Over the years, I have spoken at various conferences about non-monogamy, sex ed, and communication, including Momentum (now CatalystCon) in Washington DC, Playground in Toronto, Atlanta Poly Weekend, and PolyCon in Vancouver BC, where I was the keynote speaker in 2013.
My media appearances include being on/in CBC DocZone’s Thoroughly Modern Marriage & The Truth About Female Desire, Sirius XM’s Todd Shapiro Show, CHCH News, NewsTalk 1010, Toronto Life, SexMatters TV, InnerSPACE, The Globe & Mail, Xtra, National Post, Metro, The Toronto Sun, The Grid, Filament Magazine, and many other sexuality focused websites / podcasts.
In 2011 I founded Play/Ground, Toronto’s only sexuality & wellness conference. Our last event was in 2018 and featured speakers from across the world and over 400 attendees. Along with Claire EH, I am one of the two co-hosts of Toronto’s only sexy storytelling event, Tell Me Something Good. (Both events are currently on pandemic hiatus). My podcast on chronic illness, No Spoons. Only Knives. will be launching in fall / winter 2021. I am also currently a volunteer board member for Pride Toronto.
Born in England, I have lived in many places including Nova Scotia and Northern Ontario. I’ve been on four Star Trek cruises (but please talk to me about non Star Trek things), love horror movies and spoopy things, dream of philanthropy, and visit every single tropical bar I can find, including the one in our basement.
Thank you for either joining me on this journey for the first time or coming back. I am excited to share my world with you once more.